Sexual Relationship – the many ways we make it complicated Part 1


Information is what makes us sick or heals us – this is the basis of the science of “informational Medicine”.

Information is most insidious if we believe it is our personal choice, whereas in fact it is the result of our cultural program. It is easy to believe that the sexual and religious ideas in Islamic or other “more backward” cultures are such.

In USA and Europe we think we are above “that” , believing we are making our choices as we feel best, particularly in the field of sex. Until you come to Brazil where things are again culturally very different and as I find much more healthy. However the kind of DLE that is practised here is not matching our US/European program. Islamic women think they do what they do because Allah wants it so, European/ US women do what they think is their personal choice, Brazilian women do what they enjoy doing.

In this  way it  gives the possibility to see that also our European/USA  choices are primarily the result of our culture and not those of the individual and that there are other programs with the potential to make us much more happy and healthy – once we start to challenge our own program.

SEX is so agitatedly discussed or gives rise to so much pleasure and tragedy because it comprises so many polarities and thus has the potential for DLE  :

leading versus submissive / archetypal male versus archetypal female / self-focused versus partnership-focused / adventure-oriented versus family-oriented / limiting versus open / dependent versus independent / homoeopathic versus alopathic relationship / trusting versus realistic / giving versus receiving / replicating versus innovative / risk-taking versus guarding /  polygamous versus monogamous / active versus passive / honest versus diplomatic / conquer versus resist / supporting versus guiding

This also means it is the greatest learning ground on how to work with the concept of DLE to make it a transformative part of life. In this part I want to start with an introduction to the the DLE that the sexual components add to relationships and potential for growth:

The keyword SEX is by far the highest ranking search term on the web – over 500 million searches per month and increasing. The pornography industry has larger revenues than Microsoft, Google, Amazon, eBay, Yahoo, Apple and Netflix combined. 2006 Worldwide Pornography Revenues ballooned to $97.06 billion.”Most of the searchers are of course male. Why ? Because nature has programmed the human male to be the active hunter for a sexual partner.

Woman are not more conscious or human in that – they are simply programmed by nature to play the “passive” role in this sexual DLE by making themselves as attractive for the hunters as possible. They however mostly and  naively think that all their interest in new shoes, fashion, plastic surgery is for themselves, because they just want to look good – certainly not to attract other males – particularly when they are in a settled relationships.

There is enormous power stored up in our desires to pro-create and most of it cannot be lived-out in actual sexual activity and therefore has to be burned up in other activities like excessive shopping, working, gambling, racing, sports, power-struggle, religious excesses, politics, wars a.s.o.

DLE Dynamic Labile Equilibrium is a  central theme  of Information science, it holds the concept that polarities are necessary in ever area of our life and that it is not balance or the choice of the better pole that is the healthy way but a dynamically labile movement between the poles. (This is true for every regulation process in nature even for blood pressure

Disease always starts when we choose to log-in on one or another pole or a fixed position between the poles. This is the usul process that happens always in the long-run, it the process of aging, if one does not understands that a mono-culture, a settled position, is always unhealthy.

There are many polarities that are connected with the sexual force-field but one of the strongest is “Sexually free” versus “Sexually committed” to one partner.

What is a possible solution to keep this polarity in a state of DLE – that means a state that is constantly moving between the 2 extremes while creating an overall equilibrium ?

Brazil practices a way to deal with this dilemma that is very successful and that will  replace the USA Internet invention where millions of males are turned into masturbating online porn addicts, while millions of women turn to a shopping mania to keep their attractiveness where in reality their desires remain unfulfilled and their relationship turns bitter.

Brazil – although it in many ways looks like a European culture has its unique relationship to Sex. Every little village has at least a few Motels – Sao Paulo has hundreds like  which is an average size and standard but was voted to  have the best food These are hotels that you pay by the hour, you park in a covered garage under the room and you do not even see the receptionist  – food and drinks are brought to you through a door-system that totally protects you anonymity.

Side-affairs are the rule in Brazil with so many thousands of Motel beds being occupied – I have seen it many times that on Friday and Saturday evenings there is a long car-line waiting to get in – all with the usual darkened windows.

Even with a open German mind this is stunning. How do the Brazilian deal with this DLE ? It depends on the level of education and Sense-of-Self of the people involved. Most do it of course in a hidden way and certainly would not admit it to their spouse. For some it is an “open secret” that is is happening in their relationship but they would not talk about it following the motto “What I do not know does not make me hot”. For some it is part of an open agreement and a symbol of the trust in their relationship and a token of their wish for their mutual happiness.

For all these Motels to be lucrative it needs of course as many women to be using them as men and few  are actually prostitutes. The culture that has made this acceptable is for me the reason for the happiness of the Brazilian people, very unsophisticated and straight forward when it comes to having fun and the reason why Brazil has the most beautiful women as they have the possibilities for sexual adventures during their whole life and not only during their adolescence. Women have great sex because it is not used as a bait to keep the family together but just to have fun.

One key reason why this works so well in Brazil is because it is understood that sex does not need the deep and all-encompassing emotions that are necessary for a happy marriage – and in fact it is a part of the culture that affairs are understood not to rival with the primary relationship . To make this verbally clear – such affairs are called “having a case” and I leave it to your right brains to figure out what it means when on these dates “one is showing the documents and getting a signature”. This is an example of the need for a “Center-of-Gravity” for a DLE to work – in every area – more about this next time.

In European cultures its so difficult to have an affair, so once you get it you try to stick to it as long as possible and then the emotions come in that eventually become a threat to your primary relationship – just as with money – the more you try to keep it – eventually you will loose it all. It becomes worse if it is mixed with spiritual ideas or even God is used to forbid having sexual fun – then you get wars and other atrocities as a result.

Its wonderful to see a culture where much of this mess has been solved in such simple way and this is a reason why Brazil has such a vibrant sensual culture symbolized in carnival. Any time and anywhere you look you will see so much beauty in Brazilian woman (about men you have to judge) and they are so feminine – almost all in high heels, any time of the day -and they have and almost supernatural connection to their senses – you will feel like being a beginner – no matter how old you are :

(Note : Dont think you can come here for easy prey, like in Thailand, here you deal with woman that have an almost shocking Sense-of-Self and lots of experience.)

In order for this to work we need to have a DLE between the poles – that is the reason why the flower-power movement failed where they were holding the slogan “Who sleeps twice with the same girl already belongs to the establishment” – there was no DLE but only going from one extreme to the other.

In Europe some invented the concept of “couple swingers” – one of the best clubs of this kind is but also does not allow a movement between “bonded versus free” as here the women stays in control how much fun she allows. 

In Islam the concept of allowing one man having 4 wives while women have to be largely veiled has turned relationships very sad and most women very unattractive –  a very unhealthy movement form the times of the bellydance to the other pole but most likely cause by the fact that in these times woman had assumed too much power over men.

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Or in India culture has inflicted a madness on producing more and more children so you are so busy with your many children and sex with your own wife that you do not have energy left for anything else.

In USA the experiment of the Mormons was stopped by the puritan US army marching into Utah in the . From this you can see that our current culture is based on a female program, no matter how much they claim the opposite to be the case (again you have to come to Brazil to realize this)

For those who want to learn more about this kind of DLE we will have “hands-on” workshops at the upcoming one week training in Thailand

you can see how much this topic inspires me – this post has become quite long – but different then with other post I guess most of you have read to end

…. and here is a funny way to show what women are most afraid about :

I am writing this on a Sunday while outside all hell has broken loose after the The Sao Paulo  Corinthian Football club has become the world no 1 club at the Japan Club world cup today – Brazil is so overflowing with  energy – we will learn a lot form them in the next decades to come


About Author

Inergetix, Inc. founder and chief scientist.


  1. Dear Kiran and Debora,
    Thank you for this DLE view! It absolutely made a few things very clear to me, and I really LOVED your photo’s “overlapping”, as if you two are ONE! And the last video was hilarious…
    I hope you had lots of fun (sex? hahaha) during Christmas, and wish you a loving 2013 with lots of new inspiring insights!
    With love, Caroline

    • Dear Caroline

      thank you for your joy and your honesty – and for being the first to make a comment on this topic
      I wonder what goes on in the minds of the other 300 plus readers – but as usual it is not easy to be
      confronted with either ones deepest fears or desires – having an intimate connection with many different
      cultures is so educating, not always as fun as here in Brazil


  2. Dear Kiran,
    I am so glad you mention SEX and as synchronicity will have it, I have been completely immersed lately in promoting my orgone accumulator to people in Ottawa. For those who don’t know, it is a device (lloks like a small wardrobe in which you sit) created to stimulate orgone energy in our bodies. It was created by Wilhelm Reich, a pioneer of the concept that all our disease and neuroses come from blocked sexual energy – or as he called it, orgone energy. Not only did he view sex (in the 1950’s) the same way as you write about it in your post, but he also managed to measure the energy itself and to map out the many ways we block that energy in our bodies, develop “armoring” and out of that many different mental and emotional problems – certainly all those that are expressed in the perception of what is “normal” in society.
    Reich coined the term “homo normalis” and claimed that all of society suffers from neurosis and the fear of expanding their energy. This is why sex is taboo and rules are invented to keep in check those people who are more alive and vibrant and bring them down to a zombie state like the rest of the population.
    There is a difficulty for many to deal with DLE because it leads to a surge of healthy energy, including sexual energy. When we have developed blocks to keep it in check, such a surge causes mental and physical pain, as it seeks an outlet and just hits walls created by suppression of our natural instincts.
    Reich found that behind those walls was a sea of rage and fear and most people feel uncomfortable dealing with it all.
    Hence the reactions to topics that hit a nerve, usually about religion or morality AND the difficulty accepting medicine like informational medicine, that can really be effective in shifting the very CORE of a person, that which has been hidden and protected for a lifetime.
    But once you wade through it all, you reach a state of health of natural man, where sexual energy and life energy are all one and our energy is in sync with that of the cosmos. We are truly imbedded in cosmic energy that runs in us as well in the same manner as we all are tapped into a vast informational field. These are interesting and exciting times, for sure!
    PS – as a young child I lived in Cuba where I soaked in all that open, sensual and living energy that everyone shared with so much joy!
    Love from up north,

    • Hello Ati

      greetings from Thailand – which is almost as sensual as Cuba

      Actually it is almost to the day 6 years ago that I paid 20 000 $
      to the Seattle times for a full page article to honour
      Wilhelm Reich’s death in a USA Prison – because he was too outspoken about the
      perverted relationship to SEX in the USA

      this brought me on the RADAR of the FDA but thanks to me being knighted by the Catholic Church –
      I was protected – really the situation of 500 years ago has made a full turn
      The USA was created to provide more freedom – particularly from the church suppression
      and now it is the Vatican that helps and protects new ideas while the USA
      has become an organism to promote stagnation. Really it is never the philosophy or a religion
      that is things for the better or the worse but anything that has power will tend to abuse it.

      I value Reich for his main insight that any organism has to pulsate between its different possibilities, and in particular between TENSION – RELAXATION he called this the Orgasm reflex because in Orgasm it is most obvious. But also this pulsation should happen with ever inhalation and exhalation, even with every heart beat. My central topic of the Dynamic Labile Equilibrium DLE is a more universal formulation of the same principle.

      He observed that sitting in his Orgon accumulators besides many other positive effects stimulated the libido and was therefore nicknamed SEX-box. But he mistook it as a device that accumulates some form of energy from the environment whereas it is simply a CAVITY RESONATOR and the radiation source is the Biofield of the human in it. It creates a similar effect as the Bioresonance-LaesEr only with the difference that the LaesEr not only feeds back the biofield but also amplifies it. More about this in a post soon.