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A joke can be described as being a short story or ironic depiction of a situation, with the intent of being humorous. But is that really the case?
Jokes need to be taken serious. The line with a sarcastic, humiliating stab is extremely narrow. Please always question whether the laugh you may get is worth the pain you may inflict. Many of these “innocent” accidents occur in companies between colleagues. Although very annoying, the damage caused stays controllable. The problem gets more serious when this situation happens between partners, such as husband and wife.
In this case humiliation becomes simply criminal. It goes against everything that a marriage or partnership is supposed to be: an exclusive oneness.
In my home town Antwerp, as well as later on when I was in Israel for professional reasons, was several times invited to a Jewish wedding ceremony, where I had the chance to learn a very valuable tradition: The bride and groom were taken to a private room, known as the Yichud room. Yichud in Hebrew means oneness and exclusivity. By entering this room, the couple, creates a sacred space that is theirs and remains theirs alone.
After a few minutes they leave the Yichud room, but in a way they should never leave it. They take the privacy and oneness with them in their marriage.
You don’t need to be a Jew to create an Yichud room. Everybody can create this very spiritual “sphere” in which the relationship between partners becomes a sacred and secluded place.
When you make fun of your partner in front of your friends, you have momentarily stepped out of your Yichud room. You have abandoned your soul-partner, leaving him or her alone and isolated just for a few cheap laughs…. To make a joke is fine, but never at the expense of your oneness.
When your partner publicly criticises you, he or she has allowed strangers into the Yichud room. Others are invited into a moment that should only be between the two of you. There is a time and a place for criticism in a relationship, but not in the presence of others.
These mistakes are so common that to many they have become acceptable. But it is these little things that can erode a good marriage or relationship, especially when there are children, and the husband criticizing his wife in front of the children… Once you get comfortable in the Yichud room, you’ll never want to leave.
Willy De Maeyer
Kiran’a comment :
As you see I like cartoons and jokes, which I did not do before my RESET in Egypt. Jokes are one of the most pleasant ways to be in a DLE because Jokes are always based on a polarity. Most primitive jokes are based on talking about something or somebody in a way culture never otherwise would allow you to talk about in such a way, mostly sex, women and jews.
What people do not realize : If they make jokes about themselves it is the best way to make that joke come true its much more powerful than fearful thoughts, this is one of the secrets of the “Law of attraction” that they do not tell you in “THE SECRET”